I enjoy the game of golf. I enjoy playing it, watching it on TV, I enjoy talking about it, and I think about it a lot. As much as I enjoy it, you would think I would play more often than I do. Every year I go into the spring, thinking this will be the year I get into a routine of playing multiple times a week and really improve my game. Well, maybe next year…

But this article is not about golf, it is about our attitude; the mindset we have as we go about our daily lives. I am just using golf as a vehicle to illustrate my thoughts about attitude. For many golfers, a bad first hole or even an errant first shot can cause them to have a negative attitude through the whole round.

Every golfer needs a plan, as do all of us, for how we will handle the challenges of the day. We need to think ahead about how we will deal with the obstacles we are likely to encounter. For a round of golf, thinking ahead about the first few holes and having a conservative, realistic plan for how you will attack each hole can help you avoid allowing a bad beginning to ruin your whole day. Similarly, thinking ahead about your day, and having a plan for how you will pro-actively negotiate your way around and through the obstacles you are likely to see can be a great way to keep your attitude positive.

But, you say, my daily life is a lot more complicated than a round of golf! I agree, and I realize you may encounter life circumstances that threaten to crush your ability to maintain a positive attitude. So what are we to do? The life we find ourselves in is the life we have been given and as they say, we must play the cards we have been dealt. Often in my work as a counselor, I find myself sitting with someone dealing with a lot of hurt and anger, or facing seemingly insurmountable circumstances. In such cases I sometimes talk about a concept known as reframing – learning to see things from a different point of view. It can be a very valuable skill whereby we learn to view serious problems or obstacles as challenges, which we have the skills to face and overcome.

A frequently cited and dramatic example of Reframing can be found in Victor Frankl’s book, From Death Camp to Existentialism, where he speaks of being imprisoned in WWII Nazi Concentration Camps. For three years, he lived through starvation and torture in four camps. He lost his beloved wife and all of his family, and witnessed most of his fellow inmates die. Frankl kept his mind active, planning the lectures he would give after his release, using experiences from the death camps to illustrate points he wanted to teach. As a devoted teacher, his careful, deliberate planning of his future lectures kept his spirit and body alive in hideous dehumanizing conditions. He survived the death camps and went on to realize his vision of using his experiences as a great healer, writer and lecturer.

A positive attitude is always preferable to the alternative, so be encouraged to think about what it would look like to have a plan for facing your daily challenges. If you are already in the midst of a problem, could you reframe it and learn to see it from a different perspective? Could you learn to see it as a challenge you alone are uniquely equipped to face? Could you even learn to see it as an opportunity from which you will learn valuable lessons for the future, benefiting yourself and all those you care about?